We make noise
The Band
Porch Busket is a classic riches-to-rags story, but where the riches are people, and rags is a band. The band was conceived during the mild, fragrant summer of 2023, in the sleepy hamlet of Boulder, CO. Porch Busket is an idea borne from necessity, curiosity, debatable talent, and delectable intention. Porch Busket is a nascent band where four-to-five talented individuals mix learning with a love for music with an undetermined endpoint...
The Chaos
Knuckles (Brian)
Brian's career is pockmarked with defining moments. As a short-order cook in a lard factory, a grilled cheese mishap left him with knuckle poisoning, a rare condition that could only be ameliorated with the installation of bamboo knuckle prostheses. Now a knuckular fire hazard, Brian was forced to seek other employment, but couldn't find his passion in the usual rite-of-passage careers such as hamburger pottery and wheat smelting. While sealing storage cans for a medical waste and pork sausage plant, he found enjoyment and inspiration in the rhythms of the day. Pretty soon, banging on lids for a paycheck became hammering away at a drumset, alone in the basement, continually in search of musical companions. After leaving the factory at a young age, he decided to pursue science, where his mind currently festers. He currently strives to develop salable components of genetic regulation / editing experiments, which of course culminates in a race of giant, man-eating rodents.
Celebrity Mole (Kaile)
Kaile started life as a local celebrity in Green River, Wyoming, where she quickly gained fame as the region's youngest competitive eater. When her parents realized that there was no real future for an adult that could eat 2 kilograms of corrugated cardboard in 10 minutes, they ushered her into the world of dance. There, she flourished, dancing across the nation as her parents moved from state to state in search of the perfect location to host their ragtag quartet of competitive eaters and dancers. Along the way, she performed in pieces such as, A'la Mode - the Dance, Grasshoppers as a Hat, Tire Swings for President, and, of course, The Nixon Shuffle, which landed her on the cover of Li'l Miss Patty-Hams Magazine for the Socially Incompliant. After a set change during a local rehash of Shufflin' off to Idaho, she was captivated by a guitar interlude by a GWAR cover band. She was hooked and immediately began to learn the subtleties of the six-stringed instrument. Her hobby became an obsession and, polished by years of intense training, she began her search for the perfect cadre of like-minded musicians. To keep the lights on, she spends the daylight hours stretching ligamentous networks of both locals and people throughout the world, via the magick of digital telephony.
Flexocutioner (Sophie)
Sophie decided early on that she wanted to play a stringed instrument, but only wanted to work 66% as hard as guitar players, so the bass guitar was a natural fit. She puts the other 72% of her energy distilling her vocal talents into the fray, but only 24% of the time. Her first encounter with a bass was a memorable one - while on a vision quest in the hills West of Boulder, she came upon an isolated shrine, upon which sat a host of instruments, from trumpets to mouth harps. An irascible humanoid dung beetle implored Sophie to try each instrument, for "the perfect fit exists and will complete your quest". After nearly settling on the flugelhorn, she plugged in a weathered bass, switched it on and....the sky stood still and the trees shook with thunderous resonance. The beetle bowed to the pair and bid them to search for like-minded fellows to complement her sound. In the meantime, she pursued a career in computer-technologies, but, as the (what was then) nascent field of A.I. threatened (or so she thought) to overtake her treasured electric can-opener collection, she quickly switched to managing and perfecting internal combustion vehicles.
He-Man (Stephen)
Stephen got an auspicious start in music while peddling to an itinerant Romanian band during a stint as a door-to-door dreidel salesperson. The band members took Stephen under their care, tutoring him in the mysterious mysteries of various stringed instruments. The guitar had an immediate pull, much to the dismay of his mentors, who earmarked him for a sitar player. At any rate, he proved himself to be a prodigy, leaving the care of his adopted band and venturing out in search of a group of misfits that could keep up with his furious, yet playful, style. After some time, he gained the nickname of He-Man, a before-the-fact tongue-in-cheek nod to pronoun designations, but having roots in his penchant for hilarious, but devastating post-show antics; guzzling a gallon of whiskey, smashing every instrument on stage and challenging resident feral cats in hand-to-paw combat. In the meantime, he became fascinated with architecture, and pursued degrees to enable his methodical reversioning of local structures. His designs have been featured in several high-impact, but lesser known, academic publications such as Structural Integrity of Indoor Outhouses, From Waffles to Tree Forts, Will it Stand?, and Structures that Resemble Famous Sandwiches.
Mr Marbles (Thatcher)
Mr Marbles is the latest addition to our burgeoning bundle of joy. His journey thus far, while riddled with errors, mis-truths, subpar penmanship, and dubious wafflery, begs to be recounted. Mr Marbles was for nascent greatness and destined for immediate wealth, as one would expect when born with 64 working pairs of superfluous kneecaps. Unfortunately, Mr Marbles' itinerant uncle absconded with his patellar riches, only to be famously caught in the great Argentinian femur-doping scandal of 1998. Mr Marbles, despite being down 14 pounds of surplus kneecaps, was undaunted and immediately made his indelible mark on society as a tofu mine excavator. His autobiographical works hallmarked his experience and instant classics such as "Tofu, From the Bed-Room to the Bored-Room," "Soybean Paste Remedies for Uncurable Lactose Intolerance-Intolerance," "Curdled Missassippiphobia," and "Ham" immediately launched him into the national spotlight. Unfortunately, fame was a temporary stop on Rota Fortunae: similar to a death by 1000 cuts, it was 14 mis-steps on the red carpet that ironically led to two broken kneecaps. Without the ability to operate his trademark gastrocnemious-powered typewriter and taco press, Mr Marbles decided to turn his attention to auditory arts, whereupon he became a virtuous musician after years of cromulence and comeuppance. His rampant musicality now embiggens Porch Busket, enveloping the group in a warm glow of non-feeble rhythms and irascible detumescence.
The Waltilator 3000 (Walt)
Walter is our local regulator, tax-confidante, palm-greaser, technical overlord and ham radio operator. Thankfully, Walt has, largely in part to a settlement following a tragic accident involving a steamroller, bankrolled the operation, funding studio time, band-aids and curious pants. Our band is a tribute to his impressive skills as a therapist and human metronome.